Thursday, July 4, 2013

Why the prophet Muhamed married a 9 years old girl ?


The most common question about marriage in islam and about prophet Muhamed's ( PBUH) life is that question .......

Why the prophet Muhamed married a 9 years old girl ? 
How come Allah allows such thing !!!?
isn't awful to marry a young girl !

Im answering with smile and asking you question ,,,

Why his companions didn't blame him for what he did ?
even more , Why his enemy ( non-muslims) didn't take advantage and blame him and they were fighting islam and they just wanted a little thing to say this isn't a real religion ??
How come no one blamed him for this marriage ?
because back in time it was common thing , the girls after their first period they get married so no one blamed prophet Muhamed back in time for marrying a 9 years old girl .

There was a lot of bad traditions back in time,BUT
doesn't islam came to correct them ? not to get involve with it ?

Islam came to correct the wrongs and give the women their rights and treat every one equally by 
1- giving the woman the right to accept the marriage or refuse . and there wasn't such thing back in  times. the girl should obey her father to marry the man he picked for her . so she was like a furniture her father sell it to the highest better or to whoever pays more  .
2-  giving her the right to ask for divorce . and that's also wasn't an option for the women back in time , when the women can't workout with her husband because of the beating and the bad behavior and ..and... she just kill her self . but when the islam came the women got the right to ask for divorce and if he refused she can go to the judge and he divorces her .

Okay but why prophet Muhamed married aisha when she is 9 and why is aisha ?

First we agreed that the marriage by then wasn't something unnatural or something bad and the reasons is ... the Arab or the Bedouin whom lives in the desert the women used to have their periods in 7 and 8 years . and don't be surprised ( osama bin zaid ) he was only 16 and he was the leader of the most powerful army by then . so the women grow up fast . PLUS...

DID YOU KNOW  ( aisha ) before the prophet Muhamed propose to her , there is a man called 
( gubair bin motem) to marry her .? 
No , i did not know that 
But even if she was in the marriage age by then . why her , what's in it for islam ?

I mention in the previous topic the reasons why the prophet Muhamed married all his wife and each marriage were for a reason that benefits islam , but i will mention specifically why aisha ...

* The prophet Muhamed's best friend ( abu bakr ) the first one who believed in prophet Muhamed and he was with him in al hejra from mecca to al madina so he wanted to bound his relationship to the prophet and his daughter was in the marriage age and people started to propose , so he choosed the best man that he can trust him and trust he will treat his daughter good .

** AISHA  was very intelligent and smart girl so prophet Muhamed needed her to teach other women even after he dies, because all of his wives wasn't in young age , and that exactly what happened after he dies. she lived many years after the prophet Muhamed dies and she was the  fountain of the knowledge all the people was learning from it . 

*** She accepted the prophet Muhamed to be her husband from which she heard about his ethics and his manner and she had all the well to accept or not . and people were proposing to her from which they heard about her intelligent and behavior . but she choosed the prophet Muhamed .

I hope inshallah that i said enough , and if you have any questions about it feel free to contact me
jazakom allah khiran wassalamu alikum w rahmt allah w barakatuh .

Wrote by :
Mak omar 

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Why prophet Muhamed ( PBUH) has more than 4 wives ?



Praise be to Allah lord of all mankind , and prayers and peace be upon his prophet  (PBUH) :
In my last topic about marriage scales in Islam , i have talked about how the Islam limit the marriage with only four wives with strong and hard terms , and promised whoever unjust to his wives with painful doom , However most of the people still wondering ....

Why the prophet Muhamed keep more than 4 wives for himself ?

Before i answer , let me ask you question .., what would you say if your family told you to marry a lot of women with this terms : 
  • you don't get to choose any of them .
  • you can not divorce any of them nor to change them for other wives even though their beauty attract you.
  • you can not switch from one to another and be unfair or unjust to any of them .
  • they can't get married after you die , they will be on their own no one take care of them .
the obvious answer will be ...
No man , i wont do that 
why would i put my self even in that position , no one can handle it 
Are you saying the prophet Muhamed was in that position ? 

the answer is yes , in the quran surah ( al ahzab verse 52 ) allah said * لا يحل لك النساء من بعد ولا ان تبدل بهن من ازواج و لو اعجبك حسنهن * ( it's not lawful for you to marry more after this nor to change them for other wives even though their beauty attract you ) . and in other verse allah  addressing to the Muslims * ولا ان تنكحو ازواجه من بعده ابدا * ( do not ever marry any of them after his death ) and allah made all his wives as mothers to the Muslims * و ازواجه امهاتكم * ( his wives is mothers to you ) .

I don't understand 
why Allah put his prophet in this position  ?
where is the wisdom of marrying 11 wives with those terms ? 

from those terms which Allah put on his prophet no one can say that the prophet Muhamed was lustful or erotic .but the wisdom of that is obvious from his marriages , so  let me walk you throw all his marriages and you will get it on your own inshallah :
  1.  ( Khadiga ) prophet Muhamed ( PBUH ) married her and she was 15 years older than him , and she was married twice , and she had sons but prophet Muhamed married her and lived happily with her and she supported him with every thing ,  and when she died he named the year with *عام الحزن *   ( the year of sadness ) .
  2. ( Sawda ) and she was an old women , even ( sahaba ) his companions were wondering and saying ... ( sawda after khadiga ) she was poor and old and the people was wondering ,but prophet Muhamed married her so no one say he married khadiga for her money .
  3. ( Eisha ) after the immigration from mecca to al madina and abu bakr was his mate during the trip and went throw every thing with him , he wanted to make strong ties with him , so he married his daughter and inshallah i will talk about this marriage and all the question about it in another topic .
  4. (hafsa) and she was married before but prophet Muhamed married her after omar bin al khatab converted and has become very strong pillar of Muslim community . so omar bin al khattab married his daughter to the prophet and she was married once.
  5. (Zainab ) they were calling her * ام المساكين * ( mother of orphans ) so the prophet Muhamed married her and she wasn't that pretty also as hafsa . but her husband has been murdered in badr battle , so the prophet Muhamed married her .
  6. ( Um salama ) when her husband died she was patient and she thought there is no man better than him , and she asked Allah for whom better only so Allah rewarded her with his prophet after she left her family and converted to Islam .
  7. ( Jwairia ) the prophet Muhamed married her to seek dawa for her people , because after the battle she got captured by the Muslim so when the prophet Muhamed married her each prisoners from both sides were free and the other side converted after hearing about Islam and after their lady converted .
  8. (Um habiba ) she was abu sufi'ns daughter , and he was the biggest enemy for the prophet Muhamed and he was torturing the Muslims. so when his daughter seeks the truth and converted she left behind the sea to habasha  and she was suffering form loneliness , so prophet Muhamed sent to her for marriage so she can't suffer from that without even seeing her and she was married before .
  9. ( Maria - mimona- safia ) all the same as his previous marriage so prophet Muhamed didn't marry for the lust or any of that , but he married only for the wisdom of gathering the Muslims together and publishing the Islam .



okay he didn't marry for lust but how that helped the Islam ?


* The Arab tribes at the time were close tribes they were only listening to whom has blood connection with them .it call * المصاهره و العصبيه القبليه * means the affinity and tribes traditions , so when the prophet Muhamed ( PBUH ) get married from one of them , he becomes one of them and they can listen to what he said ... so that was major reason .

* Prophet Muhamed wanted with marriages to solve tribes problems and end wars between tribes and unit them all under one nation ( UMMA ) the Islamic nation.

* His wives become teachers to all women who came after which was all companions learning from them after prophet Muhamed death , so we see EISH said more than thousands ( Hadith ) and tough what women were shied to ask the prophet about it .

* Telling how the prophet Muhamed was in his house not only out side to the people because every one has secrets except the prophet Muhamed he said * حدثوا عني *( tell on me and tell about me ) so he was very good example for Muslim to shows a good ethics inside the house and out side the house . 

* One of the main reason for all of us to learn from it is .. women don't measure with their beauty or their age ... they only measure is  ethics and religion no matter where they come form , no matter what color are they no matter how much they have . 

* Prophet Muhamed set a very important rule for choosing the wife and he said                   * تنكح المراه لاربع لمالها و لحسبها ولجمالها ولدينها فاظفر بذات الدين تربت يداك * (The woman get married for , her money , her lineage , her beauty , her religion so chose the one with the religion you will be a winner ) and he said * خير متاع الدنيا المراه الصالحه * ( The most precious thing in this life is the good wife ) .   

That was the prophet Muhamed ( PBUH ) as his wife said * كان خلقه القران كان قرانا يمشي علي الارض * ( he has the highest ethics in the earth , he was like an angel walking on earth ) .

ربنا اتنا في الدنيا حسنه و في الاخرة حسنه و قنا عذاب النار 
( OH ALLAH REWARD US WITH THE GOOD WIFE IN THIS LIFE AND THE PARADISE WHEN WE MEET YOU AND KEEP US AWAY FROM YOUR DOOM )


wrote by :
Mak omar 







Thursday, June 20, 2013

what is the marriage scales in Islam ?


In my last trip to Istanbul ( turkey ) when i was taking the tram back to the hotel , three girls approach to me and asked me a question ....

Why Islam encouraging men to marry four wives ?
It's not fair for the woman to share her husband with another woman
Is the stander scale of marriage is polygamy  ?

There is a common mistake of misunderstanding the quran verses that talks about marriage . which in surah al nesaa * فانكحو ماطاب لكم من النساء مثني و ثلاث و رباع * ( marry a women from your choice , two or three or four ) 

Hey ... see the quran said that ...

Yes it does say that , but why you don't finish the verse    * فان خفتم ان لا تعدلو فواحده * ( but if you fear that you wont be able to be fair to them then just one .) and in the same surah in another verse the quran said * و لن تستطيعو ان تعدلو بين النساء و لو حرصتم  * (you will not be able to deal equally between your wives even if you are trying  ) .

I still didn't get the answer why Islam encourage that ?

Islam doesn't encourage men to marry four wives . he just allows it with terms . but Islam doesn't give any goods for men marrying four women ... or make the man who is marrying four better than the man who married just one . and he warns the unfair husbands with painful torture * و للظالمين عذاب اليم * ( for whom unfair or unjust is painful doom ) so Islam warns the men about unjust to the women and allows it only if the husband will be fair to them .

But Allah said , you can't be fair to them even if you are trying 
How come he allows it when he knows the man can't be fair ?

Allah said to be fair to them in a way  the person can do and handle which is the equality in ( expense and sleep over ) . that's what the person can do and can control .

Istill don't get it 
  
Let me give you an example , if a guy married two women , and he loves one better than the other , allah can't charge him for loving one more than the other , because the man can't control his heart . but allah charge him if he didn't equal and just between them in ( expense and sleep over ) . he has to treat them both equally in every thing .
and the prophet muhamed were saying to allah ( i justify for what i owe , so don't charge me for what i can't owe ) .

But i don't want to live in fear that my husband will marry another one !!

Before you marry you can put term that your husband wont be allow to marry another women without your blessing and approval and the husband has to comply with the term .
Okay , i'm so relieved , i feel so much better now
okay tell me is the islam that came with the idea of polygamy ?

Not at all , the Islam limited polygamy for only a four wives with terms . before islam every one was allowed to have any numbers of wives he wants and without any terms... 
One of the companions before he convert to islam , he has 10 wives but when he convert prophet muhamed told him keep only four . and before the prophet muhamed death ( at his final sick ) he said * استوصو بالنساء خيرا * ( i command you to be good to the women , be easy on the women ) .


Jazakom Allah khyran w assalamu alikum     ( peace be upon you )

wrote by :
Mak omar

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

why would i become a muslim ?


one of the most common question is why would i wanna be a muslim ? why would i put my self under a lot of restrictions ? why would i choose that religion ? why would i wanna live in that kind of life style ?
you see a lot of people wondering about this questions especially in the western society where they  have more freedom and more liberty ..,


before the islam comes what was happening in the world ?
before 1500 years
(Suadi arabia )

in suadi arebia before the islam comes arab used to bury their daughters alive , so when the women is pregnant the husband waits till she give birth and if he is a boy , he invites every one for big meals and drinks and they celebrate , but when she gives a birth to a girl , he has only two ways ( live with a shame and raise her ) or live with dignity and bury her . that was traditions between them at the time . 
till the islam came with the greatest gift by the time which was the equality between the boy and the girl and forbid all his followers from burying their daughters alive . as it came in the quran *  و اذا الموءدة سؤلت باي ذنب قتلت *  ( when the little buried kids ask . what was our fault to deserve it ).

( Egypt )

the old egyptian civilization had an old tradition , that every year they have to choose the prettiest girl in the country and throw her a live in the nile river , so the gods will keep their water in the river and not to dry . till the islam came and forbid them to do such thing as it came in the quran * ولا تقتلو النفس التي حرم الله الا بالحق * ( do not kill any innocent soul allah created it )

( Europe )

586 in franc courts , they published that the women does not has the right of owing any properties , or any land and once her husband is dead , all his property belongs to the country .
in england , the law gives the right to the husband to sell his wife whenever he want . and also has the right to exchange her with someone's wife .
till the islam came to europe and published his rules and his principles and forbid the rules that was letting the women sell and bought as a trading goods . as the prophet muhamed said * رفقا بالقوارير * ( easy on the women )

so the islam came to risk the humanity from dying out and put rules to keep the life going . 

"that was thousand year ago , Islam doesn't fit in the modern world now "

i hear most of the people say that , it's a new world we walked on the moon now and we have fighter jets and we have planes and big ships , i can't wear a white dress and stay at the mosque pray .
islam isn't just religion stays in mosques and homes , islam is a life style in ( work - public - homes)
islam doesn't say you just lock your self at the basement or at the mosque and pray and grow beard . it's the opposite ,,, and the prove is in the quran allah said to the prophet muhamed * و قل اعملو فسيري الله عملكم ورسوله و المؤمنون * ( work hard , because every one will see it . allah , the prophet and the people ) . and the prophet muhamed said ( allah likes the people who do good in their works )   

wooow !! really!! so any career  islam want us to be the best in it ?? 

yes , that's right , islam command you and order you to be the best in any career .( medicine - engineering - science - art - education - business - sport ) 
prophet muhamed said ( the strong muslim is better to allah than the weak one , seek strength from allah and don't say i can't )  and he said ( the hand that gives and works is better than the hand it takes ) .
that's what islam teach us . and that's what the real muslim should be .

if the islam command you to be the best , why muslim countries are third world now ?

let me give you an example ... in the medicine field , all the doctors studied the same material , how come one of the doctor get very successful and the other is not ? they both studied the same material , same science , same objectives . but it depends on the individuals not in the material.
so you can't judge the religion upon individuals action .and to prove that ...
before the first war world , the egyptian pound = 4 USD . they economy was very good by then ,
in 1990 one egyptian pound = 1 USD . in 2013  ...1 USD = 6 egyptian pound . after 30 years of dictatory . but should i say is the islam was the reason that the arab and muslim countries are the third world ? no i can not . because the wrong side was on the individual not on the religion .

 " islam and fun don't mix "

a lot of people say , if im a muslim , i can't drink , i can't take a girl friend , i can't ..i can't.. i cant. and i should ... that's pleasure killer man . 
do you know that the highest percent of suicide cases in the whole world are in the western society and the highest selling anti depressing drugs in the western society ! but why ? they don't have any restrictions , they can drink , they can sleep around , they have money ,  they can do whatever they want ... 
but you know the truth which is non of that cause you happiness , because it's something inside , something in your soul , something touch your heart and you don't know what it is .
so we agreed that alchohol , or adultery , or hash , or ..or that is not a measure for happiness ,,,
so the islam isn't against happiness measures . it doesn't stand between the person and his happiness .... but wait ......        
can i still have fun even when im a muslim ..??

prophet muhamed him self , and his companions were having fun at the mosque . ,,, really ??!!
yes , ali bin abi taleb he was the prophet's cousin . and he was really strong , so he was wrestling his friends at the mosque , and he was winning every match , till the prophet muhamed covered his face so no one will organize him , and he asked ali to wrestle him , then the prophet muhamed won , and every body was shocked , then the prophet muhamed un conver his face . and when the man asked him he said ( from hour to hour take a brake because the hearts get bored ) .  and look at omar bin al khattab one of the most powerful khlifa in islam ( was ruling the third of the world ) he said ... teach your kids swimming and horse riding and arrow games . ) 

 "i don't wanna be ostracized from the society " 

i hear people say if i convert to islam , all my friends will walk away from me , and even my family will treat me bad , and the society will be afraid of me and i will be alone .
maybe you are right , but it's only temporary time at the beginning but if you follow the islamic rules they won't be able to walk away from you , and how come they will walk away when you are treating every one with respect , and with big smile on your face , and visiting them when they are sick , and congrats them when they have a occasions , and send them gifts , and help them when they need you ,,,  woooow  really ? is the islam command me to do all that ..?
yes , here an example from the prophet muhamed him self ... he has a neighbor that was bothering him every day , that neighbor takes the trash from his house and put it front of  the prophet muhamed's house , every day ,,, and when prophet muhamed open the door. he just smile and take the trash away , one day in the morning prophet muhamed didn't find his neighbor trash , so he ask the people around him what happen to him , so the people said he is sick , that's when prophet muhamed decided to visit him , so when he visited him with bag of fruits , the neighbor said no one do that except prophets . and he converted to islam . 
listen to all what prophet muhamed said ...( treat people with good behavior ) ...( meet your friend with smile on your face ) .... ( i don't see any good better than enter happiness in your friends ) . 
if you have behavior like that , who would ostracized you or treat you bad ..!! 
that's what Islam teach us , to be a good people to our selves , and our families and our friends , and our societies .

please if you have any questions or comments ,,send message and i will reply as soon as possible .
jazakom allah khiran w assalamu alikum ( peace be upon you )

wrote by :
Mak omar